Contacting the Grumpy Parrot

I’m not really sure why you’d want to, but if you must then soldier on.

Snail Mail

I live in a small town on the Caribbean coast of south-eastern Mexcio. It’s pretty enough, if you like that sort of thing, but snail mail here is practically non-existant. So, traditional fan letters are out of the question. On the bright side, so are letter bombs. So, as they say, what you lose on the swings, you gain on the roundabouts.

Phones

Cell reception in a looters tunnel under a Maya temple is pretty poor, so I usually turn my phone off—to spare the battery. However, I also usually forget to turn it on again when I come out. So calling isn’t a great option, either.

On the upside, my phone batteries do seem to last a long time.

Email

Flattering email messages, on the other hand, are welcome (if rare) and much easier for me to access:

bruceedwardcane@gmail.com

Instagram

If you just love looking at blurry, under exposed, and poorly composed photographs, you should check out my Instagram account.

Don’t forget to subscribe and like!

Facebook

Nope.

Tinder

Already taken. Sorry ladies.

Grindr

Not really my cup of tea.

Tik Tok

Not a chance. Sorry Xi.

OnlyFans

Email me for details.

(I am, of course, OnlyJoking)

Tropical beach with palm trees, blue umbrellas, lounge chairs, and clear water.
A person wearing a green shirt and hat standing inside a rocky cave entrance.

Playa Paraiso, Tulum, Quintana Roo, Mexico

The entrance to a looter’s tunnel in Noh Kah, Quintana Roo, Mexico.

BTW, I know I look more like a Chindit than I do Indiana Jones, but most of my play clothes are World War 2 surplus. Like me, there’s a bit of life left in them, so I might as well use them. Plus, it makes me look more rugged, don’t you think?